Ten Reasons We Get Bored When Things Are Going Well

Ron McIntyre
5 min readApr 24, 2024

When discussing the concept of “enlightened” in the context of Abraham Maslow’s theories, it generally pertains to the highest levels of development and realization of human potential that he outlined, particularly in his theory of the hierarchy of needs. Maslow’s hierarchy concludes with self-actualization, and beyond that, he later discussed ideas related to self-transcendence.

  1. 1. Self-Actualization: This is the stage where an individual realizes their potential and becomes their best version. It’s a state of being that goes beyond mere creativity, independence, and realism. Self-actualized individuals are on a path of continuous personal growth and fulfillment, marked by a profound acceptance of themselves, others, and the world. They possess a deep empathy and a solid moral/ethical sense. Their journey is often punctuated by moments of intense happiness and fulfillment, which Maslow aptly termed as ‘peak experiences.’
  2. Self-transcendence: Beyond self-actualization, Maslow discussed self-transcendence. At this stage, individuals not only focus on the well-being of others but also connect to something beyond the self or help others achieve self-actualization. This stage can be seen as enlightenment because it involves transcending personal needs and focusing on a higher purpose or greater good, fostering a sense of purpose and connection.

In the context of Maslow’s theories, an ‘enlightened’ individual would likely have achieved self-actualization and engaged in self-transcendence. These stages are pivotal in his framework, as they mark the pinnacle of human development and the path to a more enlightened perspective on life. Such individuals see beyond the superficial or material aspects of existence, embracing a broader perspective and contributing positively to the world.

However, today, with all of the freedoms and many seemingly in the top part of his diagram, we are bored. I have pondered this for a long time and repeatedly returned to the same topics. This is troubling because there is no age barrier; these same reasons occur from the youngest to the oldest in our population.

Boredom, during periods of well-being, is, unfortunately, a shared human experience.

Here are ten reasons why we might feel bored even when things are going well:

  1. Lack of Challenge: When life is going smoothly, there may be fewer challenges to overcome, leading to less stimulation and, as a result, boredom. While true, this is when creativity and innovation should erupt in our minds, giving us the necessary drive to advance.
  2. Comfort Zones: A predictable routine, while stable and comforting, can also become monotonous and dull if there is little variation day-to-day. We often choose not to leave our comfort zones; if that happens, we stop learning. Creativity comes to a stop, and we settle into a boring existence.
  3. Decreased Learning Opportunities: Without new things to learn or problems to solve, we might miss the stimulation from personal growth and development. Again, this is very prominent in the lack of reading books or taking up new hobbies. My mantra is, “I stop learning when I am dead.” There are days when I don’t feel like it, but something always happens that triggers a thought for research, an article, or a book.
  4. Need for Novelty: Humans generally need novelty and excitement. When life is consistently good, this craving for new experiences can lead to feelings of boredom. This is true; sometimes, it can take us into uncharted territory. This is where I have to apply some constraints. While I can claim to do everything, some things are unsuitable for my well-being or others, so I refrain.
  5. Underlying Restlessness: Sometimes, an underlying feeling of restlessness or a desire for change manifests as boredom, particularly when our external environment doesn’t seem to warrant it. Sometimes, we feel like we know it all, so we look to make changes without thinking them through, leading to problems. To quote Robin Sharma: “The thing about Great Masters is that they always think like beginners.” So, they ask questions and find humility, their best friend, for moving forward.
  6. Lack of Purpose or Goals: Clear goals and a sense of purpose can drive engagement and interest. Without these, even a well-going life can feel aimless and dull. Goals should be the staff of life, both personally and professionally. With goals that can be adjusted, flexed, and modified for growth, your life should never lack purpose.
  7. Overstimulation from Technology: Frequent use of technology and digital media can lead to an overload of stimulation, making real-world activities seem less attractive by comparison. I have a very eclectic music selection; I use ballads to relax, classical music to stimulate my thinking, and even some rock to get motivated. The power of music is learning to use it as a tool, not as a constant banging in your ears. If you always have to be plugged in, you are overstimulated and have trouble sleeping and thinking straight. Music is a language to be enjoyed, not forced on us.
  8. High Expectations: It is not wrong to have high expectations, but if we have high expectations for constant excitement and fulfillment, regular well-being might not feel satisfying, leading to boredom. I am a great fan of BHAG (Big Hairy Ass Goals), but the only problem with them is when you are driven to meet that goal, and you finally reach the top, it is often a downer which usually results in being bored. This is when I start looking at how it’s working and how I can improve it on the next iteration. It is not a destination but a journey.
  9. Comparisons with Others: Social media and other platforms can make us feel like our peaceful, stable life is less enjoyable than others’ more dynamic experiences. Comparison bias continually evaluates and compares different options, choices, situations, and people. In this process, we develop positive and negative feelings, which can put us in a tailspin. When it is around objects and situations, we wind up in analysis paralysis; hence, fear sets in, and we make no decision and get bored. The same thing happens when it is around people, but often, that impact does more damage than just boredom.
  10. Mental Fatigue: Sometimes, even when things are going well, mental fatigue can arise, especially if we’re not balancing our activities with enough rest or variety. This fatigue can dull our interest in activities that would otherwise be engaging.

While I love silence and reflection in my day, many fear this, hence all the distractions that may or may not meet the need to break the boredom. Understanding these reasons can help us find ways to reintroduce excitement and engagement into our lives, even during stable phases.

--

--

Ron McIntyre

Ron McIntyre is a Leadership Anthropologist, Author, and Consultant, who, in semi-retirement, is looking to help people who really want to make a difference.