Ten Reasons People Shy Away When the Word “Balance” is Used
Over the years, as I have been privileged to help people grow in their careers, business, or life, I have been struck with resistance when I mention the word balance. Some say that’s nice, but I can’t do that, and others would say that’s just not me. I am more aggressive. Finally, I decided to research why we have an aversion to the word “balance.”
The word “balance” holds significant weight in wellness, self-help, work, and lifestyle conversations. However, despite its positive connotations, many feel a pang of resistance or discomfort when the topic arises.
I have always advocated looking at life in terms of continuums. Each area of our lives can be seen as a continuum, with one extreme on one side and another on the other. We find continuums in spiritual, emotional, financial, social, intellectual, career, and many more areas. Finding a balance that allows us to deal with reality and daily life. Reinventing oneself will enable one to become more balanced and accepting of other’s ideas, thoughts, and cultures, so the choice is yours.
Here are ten reasons why some might shy away from discussions centered around balance:
1. Unrealistic Expectations: Unfortunately, the modern concept of “getting it all” has become synonymous with balance. For many, achieving perfect equilibrium in all areas of life seems unattainable, leading to feelings of inadequacy. The issue with this reason is that no one is perfect, and there is no one-size-fits-all version of balance.
2. Cultural and Social Pressures: Different cultures have unique views on a balanced life. For some, the societal pressure to conform to these norms can be daunting and counterproductive. Finding ourselves in this culture can smother us and lead us toward darkness. This culture can be exhibited in a specific country or a cult in the US. It does not have to be large, just anything that forces us to see the world through someone else’s restricted lens.
3. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO): Pursuing balance might mean giving up certain activities or experiences. Some fear they’ll miss out on other potentially fulfilling opportunities by seeking equilibrium. This reason stems from the 1990s marketing world, so I find it interesting that it is now part of our social media and psychology. It is also a very true statement regarding balance because to achieve balance, one has to be willing to give up parts of one extreme and possibly adopt parts of the other side of the continuum to find the balance. There is no easy way to find balance in any part of our lives without some sacrifice.
4. Previous Failures: Past attempts to achieve a balance that didn’t pan out can leave individuals feeling defeated. Some might avoid the topic altogether rather than face the possibility of failing again. Many I have talked with have expressed this reason. However, it usually stems from an unwillingness to look at failure as a teacher rather than a devastating event. It creates a roadblock that must be dealt with before one can find a way to learn from one’s failures.
5. Misunderstanding of the Concept: Some people see balance as a static state to be achieved and maintained. However, balance is more about fluidity and the ability to adapt. When I teach about leadership, I focus on Adaptive Leadership, implying that there are many leadership styles. Learning to use the right type when necessary is critical to being effective. Again, there is not a one-size-fits-all style in leadership or life. This misunderstanding can deter people from trying.
6. Overwhelmed and Burnout: Those extremely stressed or burnt out might find balancing their lives overwhelming. When you’re deep in the trenches, it’s challenging to visualize a way out. This is where having an authentic and positive coach can help one emerge from the feeling of being buried; however, it requires that the person is willing to change. There lies the issue.
7. Perceived Loss of Drive or Ambition: Some people equate the pursuit of balance with complacency. Sitting on the extreme end of one of our continuums can be fearful because we have invested so much in getting here that one is willing to give up on finding balance. As we do anything on the extreme side, there is the adrenaline rush we don’t want to give up and the fear of feeling that one has failed to meet internal expectations. When dealing with this, one can look around and see if peer pressure is having an effect, especially in one’s career.
8. Skepticism of the Self-Help Industry: The wellness and self-help industries often push the idea of balance, along with various products and services promising to help achieve it. Some people are skeptical of these commercialized promises and, by extension, the idea of balance itself. While some tools may help in growth, as mentioned before, there is no silver bullet to achieve balance. To be successful in attaining balance, one has to be very self-aware and able to make tough decisions regarding what allows them to find the balance they seek.
9. Individual Differences: Balance means different things to different people. What feels right for one individual might not work for another. The pressure to adopt someone else’s version of balance can be off-putting and sometimes dangerous. Understanding the cost involved is paramount in finding a path that works for any individual.
10. Fear of Being Vulnerable: Admitting one’s life is out of balance requires vulnerability. It means acknowledging that there are areas of life where one isn’t thriving. This self-reflection can be intimidating for many, especially in a world that embraces a “fake it until you make it” attitude in business and life. One needs to make a choice when trying to reinvent oneself, and it requires that you understand and deal with this fear.
In conclusion, while balance is often championed as a universally beneficial goal, it’s essential to recognize that the journey towards it isn’t one-size-fits-all. The costs, challenges, and resistances faced are valid, and understanding them can pave the way for more personalized and compassionate approaches to self-awareness and well-being. It is not for the faint of heart, but it is achievable in many areas of life, and the more areas one can balance, the more happy one will be.
