Is Interpersonal Interaction King?
Time for a massive CHANGE! Through the years, we have talked about communications, connections, expectations, listening, and trusting like they are independent of each other or maybe providing a hint of relationship but tied to teaching to manipulate through one or the other.
I believe the success of personal and business life lies in understanding Interpersonal Interactions and what is involved in providing access to this process to all people.
My definition of interaction is: When you interact with an individual or a group by talking, looking, sharing, or engaging in any activity that involves the person or group, you can be said to have had an interaction.
Even though we don’t think about it this way, our daily lives are spent in social interactions where we learn about ourselves, other people, and the world. Over the years, philosophers and theorists have considered the knowledge of the self to be within the context of social interactions, based on other people’s responses to our actions providing some understanding of who we are.
The context of our social interactions can influence our dealings with other people, which is not a simple matrix that can be checked off and reported on in a manipulative way. For example, social interactions between strangers are usually ritualized, formal, and shallow in terms of connection.
Familial and work interactions are usually less formal, which means the characteristics or mannerisms of those with whom we interact (such as gender, age, race) may determine how we act. This type of social interaction often becomes a habit, which means that we may not recognize their influence.
When interactions are chronic, they continue to stay shallow, and everyone misses out on the depth of connections seldom reaching the confidant level. Social media is often blamed for this issue, but it is nothing but technology. The key is the people behind, involved, and bending the technology that continues to distort interactions.
The interaction rules, the personalities of the people interacting, and the settings and purposes of their interactions affect each person’s perception of the other and self and the outcomes of the exchange, including the likelihood of future interactions.
Depending on the importance of the desired outcomes, people have learned to use perceived cues that may signal the likely course of interaction. Among these cues are the expectations with which people begin their interactions with others, expectations about what will be required of them, and expectations about how their interaction partners will act.
Indeed, these preconceived expectations, and those formed on beginning interaction, can frame our thought and behavior toward others before they have a chance to provide any notable, active basis for our impressions. They can be affected by subconscious biases that many are not willing to admit or deal with.
Often, good or bad expectations are based on personal experience with other people’s behaviors in past interactions. When people interact with strangers or even with familiar people in out of the ordinary situations, their behaviors may be guided by overgeneralized or erroneous expectations
Whatever the origin, these expectations can manifest the same behaviors that are expected — a self-fulfilling prophecy. Our behavior, too, may be affected by others’ expectations; we may conform to others’ visions of who we are rather than to our own, perhaps not even realizing that the expectations of others have influenced our self-presentations. When you add the potential for manipulation and control, is there any wonder why we are confused about this topic?
This article will begin the process of developing a paradigm for studying the dynamic processes of social interaction. My goal is first to open a discussion and review the construction and deconstruction of expectations in social interaction. Second, examine how interactions involve communication, listening, connection, trust, integrity, and attitudes. We will look at persistent questions about the nature of these processes and how it helps chart new directions for uses of interpersonal processes.
