Imperfections Come with Being Human

Ron McIntyre
3 min readFeb 16, 2024

You are frustrated with many things in your life. That’s the reason you’re reading this article in the first place. You’re looking for answers. You’re looking for comfort. You’re looking for advice.

The problem is, in most cases, these frustrations happen because you hang on to things you cannot control. This is probably not the kind of ‘answer’ you were looking for. It stung when I was told this truth before. Still, you must accept this reality: you must take control of your life. This means letting go of others’ hold on you. Why? Well, first things first, trying to change others so they can ‘improve’ your life is a non-starter. You can’t change them.

Let’s get one thing clear. It’s hard enough to change yourself. Can you imagine trying to change other people?

They have their own lives to live. They have their agendas. They have their paths through life. You cannot control them. Nobody has that kind of power.

Similarly, memories of the past may torture you, and you can’t let go of the past hurts, embarrassment, humiliation, degradation, and physical or sexual abuse. Please understand that you can’t change the past.

It happened already. It’s not about to happen. It’s not happening now, so it’s not like you can sit up and do something about it. It’s already happened. Past tense. Unless you have access to some time machine, you can do nothing about the past.

People understand this. People understand they cannot control others or change the past. This is why they choose to be frustrated.

They let the fact that they cannot control these warp their self-image. They wear themselves down. They chase after imaginary ghosts. They wage battles that have already been lost.

The worst part of all of these is the misconception or the toxic idea that since you can’t control all of these things, you can set up some impossible standard for yourself. This leads to the notion of perfectionism.

You’re thinking, “Well, I know that negative things happened in the past, but I have a destination I should work towards. The closer I get to this, the happier I will be.”

Well, that’s an illusion. Perfectionism leads to nowhere except the loss of control. Use the idea of perfection properly. It’s supposed to inspire you. It’s supposed to push you forward.

It’s supposed to give you a standard but not to be treated like some destination. If you do that, you will lose control.

Focus on controlling your thought patterns and how you habitually interpret your circumstances. You have complete control over these.

· Take control.

· Take ownership.

· Change your thoughts, and you change your life.

· Think holistically

· Pursue reinvention

How come? Your thoughts change your emotional response to things that happen to you. Pick ideas that lead to you becoming more proactive. This leads to better decisions and better results.



Ron McIntyre

Ron McIntyre is a Leadership Anthropologist, Author, and Consultant, who, in semi-retirement, is looking to help people who really want to make a difference.