Choosing to Accept Yourself

Let’s get one thing clear. No one is perfect. Absolutely no one. Even if you take the wealthiest person on the planet with a tremendous amount of influence and power, this person might suck at basketball. This person might be unable to swim out of a wet paper bag.

Similarly, if you take the best athlete in the world, this person might not be that good of an artist. You couldn’t recite a poem even if his life depended on it. The truth is we all are a mix of strengths and weaknesses. That is to be expected. That is part of the human condition.

By the same token, nobody’s an angel. Even people you know who are kind, compassionate, loving, giving, and good can wake up on the wrong side of the bed from time to time.

Usually, it takes just one bad day for the demonic side of a person who’s otherwise a full-time angel to show up. What do you do when those days come? How do you deal with that?

My point is that your flaws are what give you character. They are actually what makes you special and unique. If people want to date you because of how beautiful you are based on beauty that others possess or some sort of beauty standard, you will be in trouble.

Why? Beauty fades. What happens when the wrinkles appear? What happens when certain parts of your face and body begin to sag, discolor, or get fat? No.

What gives you character is your weird laugh, quirky sense of humor, and off-beat way of looking at situations. These are the things that people hang on to. These are what define you.

Unfortunately, if you keep on focusing on how you meet some impossible standard, you become blind to the flaws that give you character. Many people can accept this, but they would try to rework their flaws.

They would try to reshape their flaws or beat them into submission. You could try. Imperfections can be reshaped, but please understand that they never go away. This is all part of the territory because we live in a flawed world.

Learning to accept yourself is the first step in learning to live in a flawed world. Welcome to the club. That’s how things work. That’s how things are.

You are tapping into a deep reservoir of personal power if you accept your flaws. This means you stop running away from them, apologizing for them, justifying them, pointing the finger at others, or otherwise avoiding them. Instead, you acknowledge them.

Acknowledgment is the first step. Next, you learn to live with them. Then, you embrace them. Eventually, you will reach the necessary point: making your flaws work for you instead of against you. Sadly, none of this will happen if you continue to cringe, feel guilty, or respond negatively to your flaws.